The Secret Hide Beneath

I'm tired, my body is signaling me. I'm tired, my mind is blurring off images. I'm tired, my heart is pounding hard. I'm tired, but i don't wanna sleep.

At some point, i feel a bit helpless.

I was swimming in the river few years ago, cramp on my leg, i scream for help, but no one was there. Luckily he was there, i don't remember, my memory kinda blur right now.

I was walking towards my ex's house few years ago, the alley was dark, i thought i heard some footstep behind me, but when i turned, no one there. I sped up, but two dark shadows pull me over. I was so slim those days, i fought, but i can't, they are too strong. I know who they are, they pulled down my pants and got what they want. I did not told anyone about this, went for HIV test, luckily i'm alright.

He told me i have to be strong, to take revenge. I started gain weight, i wanna be stronger. I cut off my long hair. I changed my look, the 2 devils can't recognize me anymore. I followed them. I knocked one of them down, he's still in hospital until now. I burned another's house, he's lucky to be alright.

My head spin, mum & dad told me i have a twin brother actually. But we lost him during high school in an accident. Why can't i remember anything? They told me i was in coma for one year after the accident, i forgot about my brother when i woke up. But why do you tell me now?

I believe he's still with me, he always does. Others say i love looking at mirror, it is because i saw him beside me everytime. He's right there, beside me, he never leaves me. Is it so i got 2 names? I let him used my body during night time to do whatever he wants.

Am i being emo? Nope, my brother is here. This is my real story. I love you brother.

L² = Leu + Lea

16 who am I - questions:

  Canny Har™

April 13, 2010 at 10:26 AM

This seems so dramatic.
my condolences. ur bro is in ur heart. dont get too emo over this. For he is now @ a better place.


April 13, 2010 at 10:30 AM



April 13, 2010 at 10:58 AM

*gasp* ur stronger man now..


April 13, 2010 at 11:29 AM


  the happy go lucky one

April 13, 2010 at 1:35 PM

hope u r ok. sometimes its good to let go the past burden and move on, take care :)


April 13, 2010 at 2:26 PM

放下吧 ~~~
只有放下,才能继续走下去 ...
惟有微薄的说一句: 加油!

  the penile poet

April 13, 2010 at 6:05 PM


Though it's unbelieveable after having read your blog for so long, I pray for your strength and perseverance through these difficult times...


April 13, 2010 at 6:36 PM

so dramatic on this it true?be strong & just forget those upset matters....


April 13, 2010 at 7:23 PM

dramatic but I'm admire you...


April 13, 2010 at 7:35 PM

huh?leu leu, real one ar?!
Anyways, pats*


April 13, 2010 at 8:48 PM

waa @_@
almost like detective stories..

in another way, it's good because you get to have him to encourage, to support you. =)

to me it doesn't matter who is who, or if he is inside you, or if he occupies your body sometimes, or if you are being emo or not, because i'm just getting to know you =)


April 14, 2010 at 12:40 AM

this is not a true story, right? it's fake, right?


April 14, 2010 at 12:14 PM it true ar?
anyway, be strong!


April 14, 2010 at 1:35 PM

Take more k ya..


April 14, 2010 at 8:20 PM

be strong & be yourself.. :)

  Little Dove

April 15, 2010 at 11:37 AM